Week 4 in the NFL was a good one. We had some close games, standout performances, good plays, and rare occurrences.
Deshaun Watson had a five-touchdown game, as the Texans opened up a can on the Titans in a 57-14 win in Houston. The Panthers also raised some eyebrows, with a 33-30 win in Foxborough against the Patriots.
We almost had a couple of ties as well but were fortunate to escape those, despite some ugly football. Here’s the best things from the NFL’s Week 4.
Traveling thousands of miles to not give a single shit
Jay Cutler’s always just looked like — and in some cases acted like — he doesn’t give a damn that he plays football. On Sunday in London, he didn’t try to hide it.
Yes, that’s the Dolphins running the wildcat with Jay Ajayi and Cutler not even trying to sell the defense on the idea that he might get the ball.
I would never want Cutler on my favorite team, but I respect him for being himself no matter what. Do you, Jay.
Playing through the whistle
The Jets and the Jags played one silly mess of a game. One of the best parts of it was Bilal Powell’s 75-yard touchdown run, where he initially appeared to be down.
After he got up from the Turf Monster’s best attempt to foil his touchdown goals, he finished off the run, leaving shocked Jaguars in the dust.
The Jets ended up getting the win in overtime and are somehow 2-2 after an offseason filled with moves that would suggest a hard tank going on. Those Sam Darnold aspirations aren’t looking so hot right now.
Putting up a 57-piece party platter as a rook
Watson has 11 new sons — the entire Titans defense. The Texans laid one on the Titans in a 57-14 win on Sunday.
Watson tied a rookie record with five total touchdowns on Sunday. He finished completing 25 of 34 passes with 283 yards and four touchdowns against one interception. He also had 24 yards on the ground and one touchdown.
Look at this dime:
The Blogfather — Alex Kirshner — was calling for Watson to start over Tom Savage since Week 1, and it’s seemed like a damn good move. The Texans have always been able to play defense, but now the offense is actually watchable with Watson under center.
The AFC South has been a confusing and often times ugly division the past two seasons, but this season it seems like it’s going to come down to the Texans and Titans. A 57-14 beatdown of the Titans has to leave the Texans feeling pretty good moving forward.
If you don’t love me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best
Cam Newton and the Panthers went into New England not expected to win against the Patriots. As it turns out, the Panthers beat the Patriots 33-30, and Newton didn’t want to talk about it afterward.
Cam Newton had a direct message to the media pic.twitter.com/1HXbtdWPb7
— Dianna Russini (@diannaESPN) October 1, 2017
“Don’t ask me for no interviews now. I don’t want to do it,” Newton said as he was working his way to the locker room. “You didn’t do it before the game. I don’t want to do it.”
Let ‘em know, Cam.
“She said, ‘Look ma, one hand!’”
Broncos tight end A.J. Derby had the best catch from Sunday — a one-handed snag that he made look entirely too easy.
That’s the type of catch you tweet with a GIF where you say something like “me catching a subtweet like:” or “me, catching feelings:”
If you tweet either of those, I need royalties.
CAN’T SPELL “ELITE RUNNER” WITHOUT ELI!
I know everybody got really excited over the solar eclipse, but how often can you say you saw Eli Manning run for a 14-yard touchdown?
That’s what I thought. Look at this mobile quarterback:
If you’re a Giants fan, you gotta get this in one of those electronic frames and put it in your house to remind you that anything is possible. Put it next to the David Tyree painting you got posted up next to the fireplace, and you’ll have all the faith in the world.
C’S GET DEGREES!
This Steelers drive, which was nine plays, and went just 15 yards was the NFL equivalent of doing just enough in school to pass.
Thanks to an unnecessary roughness penalty from Alejandro Villanueva, the Steelers were pushed back after making their way from Baltimore’s 46 to the 12. Two Ben Roethlisberger incompletions led to a field goal, giving Pittsburgh a 6-0 lead.
The Steelers ended up winning the game with no problem, by a final score of 26-9. But a nine-play, 15-yard drive is something special and can describe some of our *cough* academic careers. Just enough to get by.
Ugly games can have pretty endings
The Cardinals and 49ers did their best to give us a beautifully ugly 15-15 tie. After taking up most of the 10 minutes of overtime before settling for a field goal, the 49ers gave the ball back to the Cardinals.
After a near-amazing touchdown by John Brown, the grizzled vet Larry Fitzgerald gave the Cardinals the win, and a 2-2 start to the season which has otherwise looked pretty bad.
As cool as it was to see a guy like Larry Fitzgerald make that play, I think most of us were rooting for a 15-15 tie.
OTHER THINGS FROM WEEK 4:
- The Rams look... good?
- The Rams’ uniforms... do not look good
- A lot of dumb things happened between the Jets and Jags
- Kenny Britt going back-to-back, and not in the good sense
- Jonathan Stewart met a Patriotic ass
- Matt Ryan tried to play it cool, he really did
- The Eagles played in Los Angeles and it was somehow a home game
Sunday scores
New Orleans Saints 20, Miami Dolphins 0 (London)
Buffalo Bills 23, Atlanta Falcons 17
Pittsburgh Steelers 26, Baltimore Ravens 9
Cincinnati Bengals 31, Cleveland Browns 7
Los Angeles Rams 35, Dallas Cowboys 30
Houston Texans 57, Tennessee Titans 14
Detroit Lions 14, Minnesota Vikings 7
Carolina Panthers 33, New England Patriots 30
New York Jets 23, Jacksonville Jaguars 20 (OT)
Arizona Cardinals 18, San Francisco 49ers 15 (OT)
Philadelphia Eagles 26, Los Angeles Chargers 24
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 25, New York Giants 23
Denver Broncos 16, Oakland Raiders 10